What is it about late-night Sunday?

Honestly, I seem to always get the most down during this particular hour every few weeks. Tonight's is especially bad. If time was of no consequence, I would be putting a large majority of the things I own up on eBay to just be rid of them and get me one step closer to...somewhere other than here. I just spent the weekend putting about 80% of what little anime I have left up for auction, and given enough time, I want to put (almost) all of my comics up, as well as a good portion of my CD's and older books (Stephen King, you are taking up WAY more space than your entitled to!) Christ, I just pulled 25 DVDs off of my shelves that I either bought and never watched or just really don't see why I bought them to begin with! Why the fuck did I buy Minority Report? Or Training Day?? Do these films ever come up when I ramble off a list of top films ever? NEVER! Gone.

But then a scary thought occurred to me. When all this is done, when all this crap that I see as some major obstacle to somewhere is gone....what then? What will I do? Everything of mine will have been turned back to zero - I will owe no person any sort of money. I will be completely independent and with a little something saved on the side. WTF am I gonna do with the rest of my days? I couldn't think of one good answer...and it really frightened me. I had this sort of head-clearing experience like when I try to think about death too much...it's just too much for my mind to comprehend. I have no ambition. I have no goals to speak of other than to get rid of what I consider clutter. I have no focus.

What can a person be capable of when he has no ambition or focus?

Nigga stole my bike!

Enjoyed Mike Tyson's Punch Out as a kid? Then I have no doubt you'll get a good laugh out of this.
(yeah, it may have made the blog rounds already, as much of the YTMND stuff does, but the internet and I have been going through a "weekend visitation" type of relationship lately).

Also equally enjoyable is one starring Chunk. Give it a second to load all the way through - I defy you not to smile a bit! DEFY!!!

Also - what the hell Hermione?? - you're like 15!

OK - I'm done, I have to be now, I swear...I have fucking Jimmy Buffet stuck in my head now.

Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot!?!

I created a new post last night that had a ton of links I've been hoarding over the last few weeks...all kinds of weird crap. It saved, I saw it, and even looked at it again this morning. Because they were now published, I deleted all those links from my bookmarks.
I went in just now to update the template some, and the WHOLE GORRAM POST is MIA! It was up for more than 12 hours...now it's like it doesn't even exist!! SHENANIGANS!! It's a good thing it wasn't a huge rambling post...still, though...I'm a bit sore on it. I don't post for weeks and I have to come back to this amateur nonsense...

Oh! I know what will cheer me up!

Always remember:

Yeah...pointless 80's nostalgia always makes things right by helping me forget my problems. I'll probably spend the next hour going "Man, remember how cool Jem was? Weren't the Misfits badass?", and then by tonight, it will have evolved into, "Why the fuck did I order the Jem DVD set today? That show was crappy even by 80's standards!"

Now Count Duckula on the other hand...

"This...is a very depressing song."

Goddamn...how can I be this bored with the internet? Message boards...dead. My Space...really fucking annoying. There's no point in signing onto AIM anymore.

By the way...I'm pulling the plug on Stand Alone Issues - no sense letting two blogs fester on here. Update your bookmarks accordingly (you know who you are).

And always remember:


(pretty much how I'm feeling right now - this meme may be my take on that "Current Mood" crap LJ started).

Three words remind me of that girl: "Ho - Ho - Ho!"

This year, I decided to forego my usual Christmas Eve movie marathon to instead read two Jingle Belle trades I picked up recently, Cool Yule and Dash Away All. Jingle Belle Kringle is the mischievous daughter of Santa and an elf, and was created by Paul Dini, one of the co-creators of the Batman/Superman Animated adventures (that's right, the guy who created Harley Quinn!). He usually writes her into all sorts of misadventures with many of independent comic's best characters, all drawn by their creators (my favorite being her appearance in a Blue Monday comic by Chynna Clugston). It's not often that a comic can generate several laugh-out-loud moments, and even rarer that a holiday comic should, but these both produced plenty (and at a PG-13 level, too).

For all of my non-gentile readers:

My grievance aired? People need to stop decorating their office doors with all their Christmas cards like they're so many trophies. We get it - a lot of companies want to kiss your ass. It business as usual...move on.
My feats of strength? I guess it'd be helping some friends move the last two days. Who knew two rooms could hold so much stuff.

Some people never got over Vietnam, or the night their band opened for Nirvana...

How is it I always find myself trolling the internet on Sunday night? And how is it that, almost every Sunday night, I find something that completely sucks five hours of my life away. Tonight, it was MySpace. Damn you Floyd, and damn you Riley, for drawing me into this, for tonight I found the MySpace profile of an old high school crush. THE old high school crush! I know I shouldn't have looked her up, but COME ON! When you're new to that place, you immediately start looking up every single human you've ever known! In most cases, you're doing it to make yourself feel better, as you really want to hope they're doing worse in life than you are. Or perhaps I'm alone in that practice. Regardless, there she was, and it just blew my mind that I should find her that easily ("She should be on fucking Jupiter!"). The mind was further obliterated to find that, despite going College and going Greek, she had maintained every bit of intelligence she had - more so! She had amassed an impressive list of favorite films, she seemed more into theatre than I ever was, no where was country music referenced, and despite enjoying a good amount of partying, she wasn't one of those "PaRtY GiRlZ". She even did a post similar to my faux-"12 Steps" one, pondering all of her life's What Ifs...in essence, she was still everything I could hope for in a woman.

Damn. Like I said, I should never have looked her up, cause it just opened up a wound that had long since scarred. It's not like I can message her...not only does she not have any old H.S. friends on her list, but she was the one that got away! I always felt she just humored me, and by all means she was pretty cool about it and never showed it, but deep down, somewhere, I knew. I can tell you this, though - I won't write a poem about it this time! No sir, this isn't high school anymore.

I'll just write about it in my blog, like all the other aging hipsters...

Daylight Savings Time offends me...let's do something about that.

I can't recall any year in the past that had so many goddamn people being "offended" by Halloween or Halloween-related activities. Maybe it's just that these people piss me off more and more every year, but they still seem to discover some previously innocent activity like pumpkin carving or candy corn, and turn it into something that will offend or harm their children. If you are so fucking worried about your children being exposed to the horrors of Halloween, then this next generation is going to grow up to be The Pussy Generation, and I will for one will have no part of it.
This year's list of nominees for people who want to live in an episode of "Seventh Heaven":

There's the community in Minnesota that wants a woman to remove the gag tombstones from her front yard because they have names like "I.P. Freely" and "Ben Dover". Yeah, reading joke names that were "edgy" in Mad Magazine in the '60s is going to poison our generation of children just like it did to all those Boomers. Jesus, if something as tame as this offends you, how do you honestly survive the outside world on a daily basis?? Speaking of Christ...

A couple in Florida has decided the surefire way to combat the satanists that plague the tough streets of the St. Petersburg area is to hand out plastic crosses and miniature bibles. Apparently, years ago when they used to celebrate Halloween, they were unaware of the holiday's "DARK ORIGINS!!". Yes, because Halloween is always portrayed as a wholesome, happy day. If these folks don't stop being so shocked, they may break all of their monocles. I hope to God (oh, I mean my "Dark Lord") that when they wake up on November 1st, their front lawn is covered with piles of the little novelties they plan on handing out, as pissed off children realize it wasn't a Baby Ruth and two Kit-Kats they received last night.

This one shockingly comes out of the Boston area: a school there will now be having a "Celebration of Fall" in lieu of their now cancelled Halloween festivities, because a handful of parents found the decorations offensive. Apparently you can't even SAY the word Halloween anymore without causing your children to go on a homicidal rampage in the name of Voldemort. All that these offended parents threatened to do was not have their kids go to school that day. SO WHAT!?? That's great! They won't bring the other children into their "Cone of Ignorance"! How is that any different than when the Jehovah's Witnesses in my grade school just didn't show up on certain days? Their parents didn't make a big fucking stink about cartoon ghosts - they just let them stay home and breed lizards! As one parent said disappointingly, ''All it takes is one person to be offended, and our school will ban it."

Yet, as much as these folks want to save their children, they seem to have their blinders on when it comes to many other things in the world. How else does that explain not being able to tell a real corpse from a Halloween decoration. Nobody seemed to be around to get offended by that!
Perhaps these people are on to something. Should I go around and start making a fuss about every little thing that offends my intelligence? I want to see things changed on a global scale just because I find the people behind them incredibly moronic. It'll be the first phase of the plan p. and I have about ridding the world of these people committing "intellicide". The papers will have to come up with new euphemisms just to avoid using the words "massacre" and "holocaust". And do you know who'll I start with? I'll keep it topical: people who do things like this.


I fear for Christmas.